SOMEPLACE ELSE

he looks at her
while she looks someplace else.
she looks at him
while he looks someplace else.
their eyes meet for a second
and they look at each other.
both secretly wish
they were someplace else.

ADIOS

She bids farewell,
quite unceremoniously.
Watch her disappear
right till the bend.
She doesnt turn back,
something i dont expect.
Life is not a movie,
ave come to terms with it.

No tear drops on my cheeks.
No guilt in my heart.
Just the notion of
her existence will remain
till blood flows thru' veins.
Not even time can erase.

There's still words to be said,
feelings to be expressed.
But ave learnt in life,
its best sometimes to let go.

LOVE ITSELF

our college boys' hostel is under renovation. so is the infamous room no320 on the top floor. reportedly someone had committed suicide some nine years back in that room. it had remained locked, unoccupied over these years. rumour has it that he died because he failed in love.

i visited the room today morning. though the walls have been freshly painted, i can still smell the grimness in the air around. an eiree silence suspends in the room admist the chaos of the hostel. you can feel the depth of his pain suffered. i wonder how it would feel in the darkness of the night.

i pity his deceased soul. if only he had understood what love really is, he would never have killed himself. love is undying unfailing unblemishable. love is a triumph in itself.


love is the antidote
for love itself.
where one fails
love itself
will square it up.
where love as such
that never ends,
life is a celebration
of love, in love itself.

A MIRACLE CALLED LIFE

02:45, May 07.
I have been eyeing the syringe since the last three hours. I have finally decided to take the big step –to liberate myself from my evil mind that has me possessed, it’s been years. Ironical it seems, I write poems about love, life, and hope when in reality I am in such despair; A smile on my lips when my heart is heavy with grief.

I had used the syringe once to inject acid but today I was going to inject a drug so powerful it would take me to another world…literally. A thought crossed my mind. The syringe could be infected, unsafe…but what difference was it gonna make now!! I closed my eyes for a few minutes to concentrate and avoid hearing to my inner voice which was still goading me with hope.

I filled the syringe with air with great meticulous care. (!!!) I was about to inject when somebody knocked at the door. I checked myself. Who could it be at this hour? I never had anyone when I needed someone the most. Why today of all days would this miracle occur? I use the word miracle because that is when I realized I still hadn’t stopped believing in them even when I had lost out on hope. Curiosity got the better of me and I opened the door.

Nobody was there.

A chill breeze was blowing which seduced me back to my senses. The air in the syringe would have passed through my veins and stopped my heart. The same air blew through the empty lanes and comforted me. Life was in all a matter of choice, of perception, of hope and belief in thy immortal self.

14:40, May 09.
I dint do it and I have never felt more alive. My mind is as clear as a child’s innocence. A miracle saved me. A miracle called life. It’s been only a few hours since and I feel I already am addicted.

THE OTHER SIDE

messed up big time,
i stand on the road.
it leads to Nowhere.
the jarred edges
of life close in,
cut into my flesh.
the obscurity
of things done
stares down my face,
chokes me to death.
the only way to survive
seems to seep through
and come out Alive,
the other side of life.
the brighter side.
where i deserve to be.

MOTHER EARTH NEEDS UR ATTENTION

i sit down at the shallow end of the swimming pool and let the cool water refreshen me. its been over an hour but i just don't feel like getting out. its like being inside an oven out there.

global warming is increasing at alarming levels. water and energy sources are depleting. pollution has enveloped our earth. the best time to save our planet was 30 years back. the second best time is now!

please visit this website for more information:

http://doc.for.earth.googlepages.com

you can make a great deal of difference. join in to help make this world a better place to live in.

MY BETTER-HALF

my gift is my soul.
thats the least can partake.
a life spent with you
is more than i bargained.

my heart spills love,
surges each day.
your smile feels warm.
drives my blues away.

this journey of life seems
as wondrous as can be.
with you by my side,
it truly completes me.

RAINY-BLUES

i keep walking through the lonely road. its the first showers of the season. i am soaked to the bone yet care less. the rain helps blend my tears.

they say when it first rains you should be with the person you love. well doesnt the idea of you cuddling up with your love on a chilly rainy evening sound overtly romantic? bet it does! i hug myself to cheer me up a bit and keep trudging forward to nowhere. but it only starts to rain harder as if even the Gods up there wana mock me.

well i have had enough! is it a sin to love? so what if things couldn't work out fine between me and her. the memories of times we shared are by far the most memorable in my life and will probably last a lifetime. i wipe off my tears. it still keeps puring down but now it wont be able to drown my spirit or wash away my reminiscence or engulf my heart. for my heart will keep on beating to the tunes of love.

whoever said it has said it so true, "its better to have loved and lost than not to have ever loved at all."

ding***

dawn to dusk
i keep thinking of you.
rest of the time
i sleep, and
dream of better things.

QUOTE OF THE DAY

"if only somehow you could have been mine,
what would not have been possible in this world?"

-------AGHA SHAHID ALI in THE COUNTRY WITHOUT A POST OFFICE.

TEN THINGS PEOPLE DINT KNOW ABOUT ME!

1: can touch my nose and chin with my tongue.
2: personal record for non-stop sleep is 22hours. am nocturnal.
3: i hate people.
4: eight of my closest friends do not exist.
5: i have extreme mood swings.
6: zero emotional quotient and social interest.
7: trying desperately to quit smoking.
8: i get thrills from burning myself though i dread slitting my wrists.
9: i secretly relish raw meat.
10: i have a shoe fetish.

NIKKY

yesterday was wonderful. nikita hempton dropped in to see me. all because i had remembered her pearls of wisdom and had posted them in my earlier column. "so sweet", were her first words when we met.

we had fallen apart all these years. rarely met and when it happened all we did was grudge about the weather. earlier i had lusted for her and she had lusted for me but there never had been any soul-to-soul connection which is so necessary for someone in love.

over dinner she told me how much she missed the good old bad times we shared. i could only stare in her eyes in return. it had been so long i had seen that twinkle in her eye-the sign of a genuine feeling that you have for somebody. and yesterday i was just so glad...i could see that twinkle again.

well nikky, you have always deserved that special place in my heart.

THE BITCH STILL LIVES...

am writing a novel-trying trying trying.
THE BITCH STILL LIVES...nothing bitchy about it except the title.
it's supposedly a love story. though far from reality, borders around insanity but keeps me alive so i write. i gotta see how good i can get.

started writing months back in longhand and realised a few pages later my thoughts move faster than i can write. decided against and started typing on a friends computer. a couple of chapters done and he format the comp. lost all data. cant blame him though. people may try to kill me after they go through the full story.

i don't own a computer. got one at home but am hardly at home. bapu said "get awwal number and will gift ya one!" well eating mess food is much easier.

started from scratch again, typing my time out on my ex-roommates brand new laptop. this time got halfway through when his laptop got stolen. like the magician's rabbits that disappear without trace. i wept yelled prayed. was more concerned about my work than my friends misfortune. but then ave become bereft of all emotions now. my heart is hollow and not even love can complete me. i console myself, praise myself, motivate myself. grown accustomed to solitude. people around have started developing a fetish for the good things in life and i sadly, don't figure in their scheme of things.

but thats not the point why am writing this. Sana Lakotia-the protagonist in my story, i wont let her die. i will start anew again and again and again until i have things just as i have wanted, as i dreamt....for i believe in life...following your dreams, failures notwithstanding, is more important than moolah, sex and vodka put together.

THINGS PEOPLE DO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Q>WHAT DO PEOPLE DO WHEN THEY GO NUTS??
A> THEY MAKE FUNNY FACES!!


MEET ALI KHAN, FINAL YR MECHANICAL STUDENT...
POSTED WITH PERMISSION



















FEEL FREE TO POST COMMENTS. IF THERE ARE GOOD RESPONSES ALI PROMISES FOR FUNNY FACES PART TWO!

LIFE MOVES ON...

in the realms of the solitudes,
the moon as it shines a silvery grey,
i await, even as life moves on
perverse to my wishes.
this heart keeps crying away
in the primal fear of fickleness.
it needs love to savour life
and most seminal of all, understanding.
choices have been many,
all these years and
so has destiny played its part.
but now regrets are none.
i have walked miles the trodden path.
and as life sings a raucous song,
i hope, against all hope,
in accordance with the
radiance of the camp-fire,
of a clearer vision and a pledge
to move on impervious to fate,
so on with vimful zest.

THE PROPOSAL

between
picking teeth
and digging nose
he speaks,

"i sleep
i eat
i drink.
rest of the time i think.
please do make my life.
be my lovely wife."

i listen, intently,
but refuse to shake hands.

NIKITA HEMPTON

Nikita Hempton-long time friend-has an unparalleled talent of bewitching people. A tiny twitch of her lips is enough to ignite strange fires in the hearts of men. Nikky lost half of her front tooth in a biking accident when she was sixteen. Still she smiles and gives me this piece of advice.

"I was at one time completely obsessed with love but after a series of unfortunate events and severe heart-breaks 'ave come to realise that true love does not exist and if it does its only in the imagination of people.
"Love as such that people speak of, seems good enough only when you write a poem or read a tale concluding with '...happily ever after' or see a movie with romantic themes and go red with jealously.
"Love was not made for me but i love,stripped now of all expectations and feel joy even when not reciprocated. I have come a long way to this realisation and if you ask me if you should venture forth with this journey... I would say yes you should because its damn worth every second of it.
" Love is like a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. People know it doesnt exist but they still so wanna believe in it. Whoever seeks with a heart devoid of any malice will be blessed with satisfaction and merriment that cannot be expressed in words. "

I kiss her on the lips. I couldnt agree more.

CONFESSIONS

i have lived life the hard way. anything that can go wrong will always go wrong and so has it happened in my life. but there's a good thing i have learnt. ( an eternal optimist that i remain!!) i have been left with a few people in my life who have stood by me in times good and bad and now i feel obliged to thank them in the only way i could dare. though the idea may seem copied, the feelings from the bottom of my heart ring true and confer no further explanation or proof.

thank you lots...

ROHIT 'tatya' PHUTANE for being what you are and still winning your way out. if a perfect friend is to be defined in one word it should be you.

RAHUL MISTRY- the dude, who always believes i can ....and for standing by me at all times. you rock in more ways than one.

HARSHAD 'bhai-gale-me-tie' JAIN for showing me a friend can care,share and make you laugh at the same time. for all the pranks we played....we make a great team.

AKSHITA SHAH for making me wanna be a better me.

DEEPTI RAO for pushing me always into unknown territory and backing me up so that i emerge victorious.

SANA LAKOTIA for making me believe in love.

NAKUL HULSWAR-my Mona darling, for having the most purest of all hearts in the whole world.

DILIP '$%#@^&*' BALU for showcasing exemplary courage, support and forgiveness and fighting for me against all odds.

NIKITA 'nikky' HEMPTON for living her life and letting me live mine.

ADITI CHAUHAN-the great, for letting me know that the world will keep spinning around no matter what. i loathe to detest you.

NICOLE KIDMAN-the perfect portrait of an angel as i see her, for being my lady-luck.

my grandmother for being the coolest daadi in the world.

and finally my parents. i would have been an atheist but for them.

KEEP THAT GRIN ON!!!

Life can be seriously funny but there are many of us who fail to take in the humour. They are so besotted with the eccentricities of life that they do not take into account the small but precious things of life and live (drag their life) with a huge burden on their heads worrying about everything. This is where they really fail. Shit happens…to everybody. You are not the only one who is singled out for one of life’s more peculiar tragedies. It’s normal and that’s how life goes with its ups and downs.
Still people will go on making their lives complicated. They will fret and fume and cry out loud. They will frustrate themselves and end up frustrating people around as if it’s gonna make any difference, as if its gonna help solve problems. Well if that were to be the case then I would have been a winner by now in everything I have done. My close friends know about that episodic eight month chapter of my life when I had given up all hope. I still don’t know how I survived but now when I think of it, it only makes me laugh. I wonder if it was worth all that trouble. Nope it wasn’t. That experience has enlightened me, helped put a smile on my face forever.
It takes guts to laugh at our own self. It separates the men from the boys. It helps ease out that grim air around and makes things comfortable. For life is not only about surviving and winning the long race, its about savoring each moment that comes by. As for the troubles it will pass away and there will always another chance. So be happy and smile and let the world wonder what’s on your mind. Ask Simba-the lion and he will roar, “Hakuna matata” – don’t worry be happy.
Here is a yoke…sorry joke I heard not long ago. A chicken asked an egg how it would like to have its life. The egg retorted, “funny-side up!!”

IN YOUR EYES(POEM)

Most expressive of all,
Silence- the true pure
Language of the soul.
Conveys me every time
How much you love me.
Beneath the glassy surface,
I can read, of what,
Your heart has to say.
But why today do I see
a sparkle so unfamiliar.
Someone else in your eyes.
Have I wronged somewhere?
Or is it just a bad notion.
I put on dark glares.
Let my fears be within.
Unnoticed to your eyes.
My love for you
Shall forever remain,
Faithful, virginal, implicit,
Right till the very end.